Should Brides and Grooms adhere to wedding traditions during their ceremony?

A common topic of questioning when I meet with my couples is regarding wedding traditions.  Questions I get asked range from:  Should the Bridesmaids come first or last?  Do I have to wear white?  Do I have to have a Flower Girl?  Do I have to wear a ring?  Does my father have to walk me down the aisle?  Do my Bridesmaids and Groomsmen have to be over 18 years and married themselves?  The answer to all of these questions is that it is up to you.

When planning your wedding day and what you would like to see happen, remember one thing, it is what you both want.  If you like a more traditional wedding ceremony, great!  Wanting a traditional style wedding doesn’t mean that it is going to be old and stuffy, boring and impersonal. Traditional wedding ceremonies can be beautiful, meaningful, memorable and personal.  With the help of your Wedding Celebrant (someone like me), he or she should be able to give you ideas about how your ceremony can be delivered in a way that means something special to you.  I always ask my couples what style of ceremony they would like; who would they like to involve in the ceremony; are they considering a ritual, for example, a reading or other symbolic sentiment; is the Bride walking down an aisle; I don’t assume anything.

Weddings are so variable these days.  Gone of the days, during my parents generation, where couples didn’t get a say in their ceremony – getting told what to say and what to do.  How lucky we are, in this day and age, to have the freedom to get married where we like, say what we like, dress how we like, and involve who we like in our wedding ceremonies.

Wedding-DogIf you want to dress like Batman and Wonder Woman, or involve your children and/or “fur-babies”, have your closest friend walk you down to your partner, walk down the aisle to heavy metal music, get married in Roller Derby ring, sing your vows to one another, open a nice bottle of wine during the ceremony for a toast, receive advice from guests regarding relationships during the ceremony – the choice is up to you.

Things to remember:

Don’t get caught up with thinking you have to abide by tradition; your ceremony, your way!  Remember that this is your day and it should be the way you want it to be; totally unique to who you are.  One of the best parts to my work as a Marriage Celebrant is hearing about all the wonderful and different ideas my couples have.  Speak to your Celebrant and don’t be afraid to express your ideas no matter how “out there” you might think they are; if they are anything like me, they will be happy to come along for an amazing ride!